TELL someONE.
TELL anyONE.
TELL everyONE.
More often than not, survivors of sexual assault will hide their experience from public view.
Whether it is because of shame, confusion or the threat of retribution on the part of their attacker, those who have experienced the horror of being sexually abused believe it is easier to hide their experience form the world, stuffing the anger and shame deep into the inner workings of who they are in the hopes that, somehow, everything will be all right.
The problem is — all that anger builds up and manifests itself in negative ways that create even more pain and suffering in the life of a survivor. Relationships become hard to live with. Emotional triggers easily set off negative responses to otherwise-normal situations. Life becomes more difficult to deal with. Escapes, such as drugs and alcohol or sexual-related addictions such as pornography, provide only temporary relief from the pain, but do not deal with the problem itself and ultimately does nothing more than create more anger and shame.
It’s time to tell SOMEONE, ANYONE and EVERYONE and understand that, as a survivor of sexual assault, there is life beyond the experience that is worth living.

TELL someONE

Whether it’s a close friend or a family member, tell someone about the experience. Give as much detail as you can remember about the experience. A trusted friend or family member will listen and try to understand what you are experiencing. You might also find that the person you tell is, themselves, a survivor of sexual assault and can relate to your experience. They can be the inspiration for you to report the crime to law enforcement as well, and can help you work with authorities on bringing your attacker to justice.

TELL anyONE

Don’t be afraid to talk about your experience. A recent Centers for Disease Control study has found that 1 in 4 girls and 1 in 6 boys are sexually abused before their 18th birthday. If those ratios were plugged into the current number of kids enrolled in every school in the state of Nebraska, it would be enough to fill up two-thirds of the 90,000-seat Memorial Stadium, home of the University of Nebraska football team, where they have played to a sold-out crowd every game since 1962. There are a lot of survivors of sexual assault out there, and many of them would be inspired by those of us who aren’t afraid of sharing our experience.

TELL everyONE

For generations, the crime of sexual assault has been a “don’t ask, don’t tell” kind of crime. It’s a crime that happens far more often than it is reported — only about 3 in every 10 attacks are actually reported to the authorities. Many survivors are told that nobody will believe them, or that it was just boys being boys, or that their family will face serious consequences if they tell anyone about the experience. None of this is a good reason to NOT tell everyone what happened. You should not be afraid of, or intimidated by, your attacker’s threats or suggestions.

The crime of sexual assault is one that has consequences well beyond the physical act, and the idea that things will be fine as long as nobody knows what happened is not an idea with a positive outcome. As survivors of sexual assault, we must:

TELL someONE
TELL anyONE
TELL everyONE

and bring justice and peace to our lives, while at the same time putting those who sexually assault another human being in their proper place. When would NOW be a good time to begin?